Fran Magazine Merch Drop

Fran Magazine: Issue #126

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Foreword

When former roommate Tristan and I lived together, we often joked that small business owners had become the new version of “the troops” — do you support small business owners? Social mores suggest that one must support small business in one way or another, and those who do not are somehow personally responsible for the downfall of, like, the middle class or whatever. I don’t not support small business owners, but sometimes I have to get coffee before 9am in my neighborhood, and I am going to abandon small businesses in order to do that.¹

I recently rewatched Mistress America for a piece I’m writing for Bright Wall/Dark Room, and one of the conclusions I came to having revisited is that when I saw this in theaters, I was not aware the extent to which “opening a restaurant” is like, not a good idea. Obviously now we have things like The Bear which teach us that doing molecular gastronomy will lead to a giant argument about what category a show belongs to in the Emmys. But at that time, I was like, “Opening a restaurant seems like a normal and financially secure job.”

All of which to say that the process of trying to list one mug on a website that has a shipping program attached to it after watching a number of art house new releases over the past three weeks drove me nearly insane, and for all my wry detachment towards the world of small business ownership, I now understand why practicing such a job would drive a person completely insane and demand unyielding support from those around them. All of which is to say: I think the Fran Magazine mug link works, and don’t get mad at me if something is weird.

Fran Mugazine link

Here you go.

Per the description, worth reading here if not also on site:

10-ounce diner-style mug from which you can drink anything: coffee (hot), coffee (iced), tea (hot), water, Diet Coke, root beer, and many more delicious beverages or "mug cake" (? are people still doing this) of your choosing. Fran Mugazine is dishwasher safe, but regular fragile which means if you drop it... well, RIP. Sips great!

The only available shipping is Media Mail, because it is affordable for low-volume sales like this. It feels insane to ask for ten-to-twelve dollars shipping on a mug even though that's how much shipping should probably cost if you really think about the logistics involved... That means that this shipment is NOT TRACKED – ie no tracking number, ie it just shows up at your house one day. For hundreds of years this is how people got their mail and it worked just fine, and it still works just fine today, I promise.

IF you know me (Fran) and live in the greater NYC area and want to meet up for your mug to save on shipping, choose “customer pickup” when you are prompted to pick a shipping method. If we don't know each other but you live in the greater NYC area, feel free to introduce yourself if we are ever at the same event or normal bar; otherwise please accept that I don't want you coming to my house. If you choose “customer pickup” and don't live in the greater NYC area, your ass is NOT getting that mug!!!!!

I have a pretty limited supply of these mugs for the time being and intend (hope to?) sell out. If you don’t get a mug this time, don’t worry. I will do another round of shipping in early December once I am back from residency.

Ranking of mugs in my home

I am guilty of buying mugs all the time, everywhere I go, because I drink coffee every single day and I drink tea many days, and I don’t really think that having more mugs that cups or glasses is that strange if you are peddling in caffeinated beverages and giant nalgenes 98% of the time. Off the top of my head, I don’t even know what I’d put in a regular glass — juice? Please.

In turn, I’ve come to collect a lot of mugs, way more than ten, but I’d like to take this mug launch opportunity to show you ten of my mugs, ranked by bad to good.

My worst mug was given to me for free from Rutgers Graduate School | Newark and comes in the all time worst shape a mug can come in. When I see the bulbous irregular shape of the mug I am overcome with disgust and disdain for my alma mater which I otherwise enjoyed going to.

My next bad mug is my First Cow mug. To be honest, I like this mug a lot, and it was given to me as a gift, I believe from friend of the magazine Harris Mayersohn.² It is not bad because it is A24 merch and it is not bad because I am mad at Harris. It is bad because I am reminded how the release of First Cow was unfortunately the same weekend “Covid happened” (the back of the mug says March 6, 2020 — the same day Rutgers Graduate School | Newark cancelled classes lmao) and I think about how this graceful, beautiful film went unseen by many. STREAM FIRST COW!

These are my medium to favorable mugs, starting on the left with a mug I got from Jeni’s when I worked there a decade ago. Jeni’s used to put out single-color mugs relating to a current or former flavor a la the Pantone mugs you see at art museums. I never had the Black Currant Lambic sorbet at Jeni’s; I did have the Cherry Lambic sorbet at Jeni’s, which I loved. It tasted like medicine (good). I wish Jeni’s would get back into the slick merch game and stop “being Democrats.” My world’s greatest dad mug comes from Aubrey on my first visit out to LA. It has survived approximately five moves and I’ve come to believe it is indestructible. The plain tan mug belongs to a set of four that Phil moved in with. These mugs are simple, unfussy, with a pretty interesting shape and tiny handle. I use these most days mainly because we put them on the lowest shelf and I am 5’2”.³ My last mug is a Moomins mug that I got in Iceland with Cameron and Lucy. I don’t love the feel of those tin mugs and more often find myself eating a snack out of it — cashews, olives, idk — rather than a beverage. But I love seeing the Moomins in my kitchen.

Here are my top three mugs, two of which were made by

Marian Bull

. I purchased the giant ceramic mug with the big handle at a stoop sale we had last fall — I think I spent all my earnings from the stoop sale on the mug, which I believe is what we call “turning a profit.” The big handle is extremely satisfying. I also once dropped this mug from a low distance (I am 5’2”⁴) and the mug survived. That’s not to say you should drop a Marian mug. I’m saying that it survived a miracle — and that’s not nothing. The mug on the far right was a CUSTOM “I’m at the festival, the film festival” mug commissioned by Cameron for me. As we say goodbye the festival, I think back on how I can drink from the mug any time of year and muse on how I sat on the ground outside Walter Reade theater. In the middle is one of four little vintage espresso cups that I drink espresso out of very quickly when I have to leave early in the morning. If left to my own devices, it takes me approximately three or four hours to drink an iced Americano — and I like it that way.

And last but not least…

Wow.

1. Meals Meals Food on Blank Street Coffee:

I like Blank Street. I’ve liked it since it first opened, before everyone knew it was backed by private equity. It’s the perfect option for pretty good coffee when you don’t want to go to Starbucks or Dunkin. I saw a video of Matt Rodbard, TASTE editor in chief, saying that NYC needs more places with “coffee programs” and “baristas” that aren’t like Blank Street. He continues: “Fuck that place,” before proclaiming that a cup of coffee should cost $10. Sure, and also we need more bars that stock sensible IPAs with delicate flavor profiles from employee-owned breweries, and less white authors writing about Korean food. Please, live in reality. Blank Street is in the business of selling products that are pretty good, not shilling $45 10oz bags of coffee beans roasted in the back of the store. It is like Glossier for coffee, and not pretending to be anything else.

2. An initial draft of the magazine said it was from Cameron Scheetz. This was wrong, and Harris yelled at me (something Cameron would never do).

3. I am 5’8”.

4. I am 5’8”.