Fran Magazine: Issue #102
Everything I ate in London
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Fran Magazine returns from vacation
I’m back from vacation! I turned 3312! I’ve never traveled over my birthday before. I’ve traveled “around” my birthday — Iceland before I turned 263, Florida right after I turned 254. But I’m always otherwise home and around and usually working5. Not this year! Not for 336. Last fall, or maybe early December, I was having all sorts of anxieties about what a wasted year it’d been — how much had gone wrong or awry or pushed aside. I didn’t want to be around on my birthday in part because I felt like I would rather just elide the whole thing. And you know what? It worked! Instead of taking the day, I took a little over a week. It was decadent and expensive and I won’t be doing it again soon — but what a blast!
Phil and I went to London, where I’ve spent plenty of time7 and he’d spent one layover. I love London — it’s where I fell in love with city life and city living, and it’s an amazing city to be in if you love art and culture and food.
Yes! The food is good in London! You will hear otherwise from people who stick to touristy areas or fall victim to over-priced full English breakfasts. We ate a lot of great food there, and people who balk when I say that I’ve always eaten well in England want to know where I go and why or how I know to go there. Well, here it is!
Friday
Arrived, jet-lagged, weather warm but too windy. We stayed in Shoreditch — I asked Phil if he wanted to stay in the Bushwick of London and he said sure; upon arrival, he said, “It’s more Williamsburg” — which is generally a pretty good area for food. For lunch, we went to Yun Gui Chan Rice Noodle, which was a rec from
. I’ve loved Vittles’ food criticism for a few years now, and their Six of One map of London restaurants was essential. I got a big pork broth soup with fish balls and fried tofu. Loved!For dinner, we went to Standard Balti House which is also in Shoreditch, a restaurant I’ve been to so many times I’ve lost track. There is a stretch of Shoreditch called Brick Lane with curry houses all claiming to have the best Indian food. Is Balti the best one? In my brief surveying a number of years ago, the answer was yes, but the truth is that it’s pure comfort for me to have a slightly too spicy lamb madras with a garlic naan.
Before bed we got doner over fries from Artists Cafe at [redacted] am.
Saturday
No breakfast! Marx! George Eliot! George Michael!8 From Highgate Cemetery (amazing), we went down to Camden — sort of because I felt obligated just to show Phil what the vibe was there. Camden was basically over when I was there a dozen years ago, and it was more over in 2016 the last time I was there, and it’s even more over than that now. Horrible! Crowded! The worst kinds of tchotchkes! That said, I got a great panini at Camden Bakery and then we got the hell out.
After a showing of Paris, Texas (!) with Ella at the Prince Charles, we went back to Artists Cafe at [redacted] am for dinner where I had a halloumi wrap and fries.
Sunday
I wanted tulips from the Columbia Road Flower Market and I got them.
From there, we hopped the bus down to Borough Market which is one of the more touristy London markets that I actively and eagerly recommend. It’s a giant food hall, sure, but there’s great produce, weird mustards, it’s not all “fried chicken this way or mushroom risotto that way,” but it’s kind of that also. The south bank of the river is so scenic and it was really gorgeous that day. I got a crème brûlée donut from Bread Ahead that looked like this:
Plus:
These were SMALLS. Plus we split a sausage roll. I was unfortunately too full for the pork and pistachio terrine I’d been ogling, which is unfortunately one of those foods I just know I have to eat whenever I see it.
From there, we went to Greenwich on the NOW UBER SPONSORED??? water taxis where we walked around and eventually split fries and had a beer. Assume I’m having 2-3 beers a day which is extremely unlike me and also I was on vacation.
For dinner we went to St. John Bread and Wine — the second most recommended restaurant of all the places we looked into. Everything I ate with meat in it was amazing (chicken liver toast, a terrine, smoked haddock, the literal heart of some animal — ox? — that Phil ordered because I was too nervous). The titular bread (and butter!) was also good.9
Monday
At some point during my time in London a dozen years ago, I have a faint memory of having one of the Shoreditch beigels but not at the actual establishment, just in my apartment. Regardless, I remember it as plain bread: no toppings, no fillings. This time, I had to get salt beef.
I hate having to wait in line for just about ANY food, but if there was anything I’d waited for in recent memory that felt worth it, it was this.
That night we saw ABBA Voyage — an experience so bizarre, harrowing, and fun that it will eventually get a post of its own. Prior to being scared out of our wit’s ends by ABBA holograms (? maybe demons), I have to admit that the hot dog we had at the ABBA Arena (lol) was surprisingly good.
After ABBA — exhausted and traumatized — we went to Standard Balti to debrief.
Tuesday
Sickos voice ha ha yes!
Grabbed a classic and CHEAP (under 10 pounds… don’t get tricked into paying more) full English from the cafe across the street from Goldsmiths. I prefer regular breakfast sausage to black pudding but I also want it on the record that I like black pudding and I’m NOT afraid of it.
For dinner, we got a cheap fish and chips at Fishcotechque where they allowed me to pay a little less because I was short on cash. THANK YOU, FISHCOTECHQUE! Not unlike a full English — I get that there’s a certain delight in overpaying for “classic” English food, but there’s really no need to and some of the cheaper stuff is often better.
Wednesday
The actual most recommended restaurant to me was 40 Maltby Street, which doesn’t take dinner reservations so takeaway lunch sandwiches it was. Minus the part where I got mustard on the inside of my new London Review of Books bag (lol), I have to say this fully lived up to all of the hype. We each got a ham and cheese sandwich (second slide) on soft, salty focaccia.
Before dinner I got a quick scoop of the ricotta sour cherry at Gelupo. Jeni’s Ice Cream-heads will remember an occasional flavor she busts out of the Jeni’s vault known as goat cheese with cherry. These two flavors — cheese with cherry — are as different as they come! The Gelupo base is very, very mellow and the cherries burst out. The Jeni’s is tart all around. I might prefer the Gelupo, but that’s just me!
Dinner was another
rec: Laxsa Soho where I had Assam Laksa (coconut stew with sardines and pineapple). The weather had been so uncooperative that day and it was great to get a hot and wonderful soup. RECOMMEND. Nearby, I also spotted…?
Thursday
My birthday itself! I started the day with two pastries: a cheddar and onion swirl and a rhubarb danish. Both perfect! You’ll note, perhaps, that this was a really dessert heavy day.
For lunch, we stopped at Tongue & Brisket (what it says on the box) where I had a salt beef, this time on rye (different! soft! maybe less sour, which I loved about the beigel, but still good).
From central London, we schlepped out to Ilford for an insane trek of my own making: I had to try the sheeryakh as written about in — where else but — Vittles. Watani Sheeryakh out in Ilford is run by just one man, Sam Bagshi, who is possibly the nicest person who has ever lived! We enjoyed the freshly churned sheeryakh (a cardomom, rosy frozen milk gets shaken cold as you wait) with ground pistachio and baklava (Phil got the additional rice noodle topping — chewy and divine). Probably the best dessert I’ve had in years!
For dinner, we went to Burra e Salvia in our neighborhood with Ella and my college friends Christian and Amy where I had deviled eggs and an asparagus pasta and split a tiramisu with Phil for dessert. I was drunk! It was divine! I love being 33!
Friday
We took the train out to Margate where we hiked the coast all the way to Broadstairs. We stopped for lunch at a place called Captain Digby where I had a cheddar and pickle baguette and some fries. The pickle was less, like, dill pickle and more like a jam or some kind of chutney. Kind of the ideal cold sandwich! You may catch me making this over the summer.
Once we were back in London, we met up with my friends Ricky and Maddie and Becky with whom I went to Goldsmiths for drinks and then we went for a late night final go at Standard Balti.
Saturday
One last rodeo at Borough Market with Phil and Christian. Oysters, yes, another Bread Ahead donut, yes (this one was pistachio), but then this time… the terrine…
From there we walked all around, eventually making our way up north to see Mani and Elena for drinks and then wound our way back down towards Shoreditch via Best Turkish Kebab where we’d been told by Sam at Watani Sheeryakh that we had to go for the best doner in the city. Being in Best Turkish Kebab around midnight (they close at 3am) and watching that staff work (it’s carry out only) puts — with all due respect — Hulu and FX’s The Bear to shame. Simply the most dazzling, functional, fast-paced, and insane kitchen process. I would have stayed there all night!
Sunday
Mid af sandwich from Caffe Nero, and back in New York City for a good old neighborhood brown rice bowl and chicken and vegetables. Diet starts tomorrow! JK! It was so much fun to eat so freely and enthusiastically and curiously. I’m happy to be back and still — somehow — full.
I turned 29!
I turned 33!
I turned 23 that year.
I turned 23 that year too.
I’ve experimented with working on my birthday and taking a single day off… imo, I’d rather work that day in a half-assed sort of way than take a weekday off when none of my friends can chill.
29!!!!
I won’t belabor this more than I have to but: I studied abroad at Goldsmiths [redacted] years ago.
Would George Eliot have liked the music of Wham? You tell me.
The vegetables and desserts, however, left something to be desired — my pavlova was a bit underbaked and chewy, for instance, and we paid more than anyone would care to admit to eat what felt like a really tough artichoke that was literally just… an artichoke.
when i saw the beach picture at the top i was like--now how did they get over there! but then it was explained (train)
i'm always totally in awe of people who have the foresight to structure trips around incredible new meals and restaurants. genuinely: wondering how you did this! lots of planning ahead? or was much of it impromptu (popping into places, google mapping "pastries near me" the night before, etc.). i want to be better at being an adventurous vacation eater... HBD!